Leave it to Dolly Parton to channel a lifetime of love (and loss) into a song that has everyone reaching for tissues. Her newest ballad, “If You Hadn’t Been There,” is a heartfelt tribute to her late husband, Carl Dean, an open love letter to the man who stood by her side for nearly six decades. Dean passed away earlier this year, and while Parton has always been private about their relationship, this song offers a tender glimpse into their quiet but extraordinary love story.
Their love story kicked off in the most Dolly-esque way possible. It was 1964, and an 18-year-old Parton had just landed in Nashville with big dreams and a bag of dirty clothes. Enter Carl Dean, who spotted her at the Wishy Washy Laundromat (yes, that’s its real name) and decided he had to meet her. Dolly, being Dolly wasn’t about to jump into something without getting to know him first. “I wouldn’t even take him in the house,” she once said, laughing about their early porch-only dates. But Dean knew what he wanted. “He said he knew right the minute he saw me that I was the one he wanted,” she shared.
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Dean was the polar opposite of his larger-than-life country star wife. He avoided the spotlight like it was a bad wig, content to support the “9 to 5” singer from the sidelines. But their relationship was far from boring. They had their own way of making it work, balancing their differences with humor and mutual respect. “We’re not in each other’s faces all the time,” Parton once explained. “He’s not in the business, so we have different interests, but we enjoy the things we love to do together.”
That deep understanding comes through in “If You Hadn’t Been There.” Packed with lyrics like “You made me dream more than I dared / And I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t been there,” Parton credits Dean with being her rock through every triumph and trial.
“I fell in love with Carl Dean when I was 18 years old. We have spent 60 precious and meaningful years together. Like all great love stories, they never end,” Parton captioned an Instagram photo of herself and Dean when they first met. “They live on in memory and song. He will always be the star of my life story, and I dedicate this song to him.”
Fans have taken the song to heart, too. One Reddit user confessed, “I didn’t think a Dolly Parton song would have me sobbing on my couch tonight — but it did.” Another said, “This is the kind of love everyone dreams of.” And the moments where her voice cracks? Fans feel it just adds to the delivery. “Every time her voice cracks in the song, it kills me,” another fan shared.
Parton and Dean’s love was far from conventional, from their private partnership to the playful “open marriage” quips Parton shared over the years, but this song has reminded everyone just why their love was so iconic. Their story proves that sometimes, love doesn’t need a spotlight because its brilliance speaks for itself.
Before you go, click here to see all the times Dolly Parton’s fabulous red carpet and onstage fashion stole the show.
