People avoid discussing or acknowledging major issues and problems with infertility even when it is always on their mind. Some people call this “the elephant in every room”. You’ve been trying for several months, sometimes years however your belly isn’t growing and there is no baby on the way. Most people need ways to cope with infertility because it is affecting every aspect of their life. In some cases, couples have problems with intimacy and their sex life when they are struggling with infertility. They no longer have a spontaneous sexual relationship because they constantly plan around ovulation instead of stimulation. Not being able to conceive naturally or with treatment makes you feel powerless. The best thing to do is to become educated on various ways to cope with infertility and all that come with it.
Here Are the 8 Ways to Cope with Infertility
- Join an Infertility Support Group
It is important to get help anytime you are going through a traumatic situation. Friends and family can provide a great deal of support but unless on of them have had fertility issues, they cannot relate to your problems. They also find it challenging to find the correct things to say so they usually put their foot in their mouths. By joining an infertility support group, you can engage with people that have similar experiences as you have had, and they understand what you’re going through. The support you obtain from the group can help you cope with infertility. Some people are more comfortable with one-on-one peer support and others work better with a group. Either way, the goal is to find support.
- Pursue Professional Help
Sometimes you may feel that the support from peers, family and groups may not be enough. This is when its time to seek professional help. This is especially necessary if you are unable to express your feelings, feeling depressed or you need more guidance. Couples dealing with infertility sometimes want to address their feelings together, separately or they may go back and forth between the two. They need to choose the type of counseling that is best for the both of them. Most fertility clinics can refer professionals to provide counseling to their patients when needed.
- Be In Touch with Your Feelings and Fears
It is easier to cope with infertility if you can identify your feelings and fears then acknowledge them. Individuals and couple encounter all types of anxiety, isolation, shame, guilt and even jealously of other couples that have been successful in conceiving. Often when people care having problems conceiving, they develop a low self-esteem, and their emotions can be elevated from several different stressors. When one is incapable of meeting their expectations, it negatively impacts the quality of their life and they become fearful. Identifying and acknowledging your fears and feelings is the start of coping with infertility. The more you understand your emotions it will help you gain a more in depth understanding of yourself.
- It’s Okay to Cry or Be Angry
Don’t let anyone tell you that you shouldn’t be angry or that you shouldn’t cry. It’s okay to do both as much as you need to. Do not hold your emotions, let hem out! You don’t permission to scream or yell and no one needs to justify how you deal with your frame of mind. It’s okay to be mad at the fact that everyone is getting pregnant except you including women that did not want to be mothers. It does not matter how you express yourself or release anger and rage as long as you stay safe and not harm others.
- Don’t Play the Blame Game
It may be hard for you but don’t play the blame game! Don’t blame yourself or anyone else. Not be able to conceive whether it is you or your partner it is not your fault. It could be due to genetics, other factors or you may never know what or why? It can be beyond difficult to accept the fact that you may never conceive but blaming yourself will not change the facts. You should focus on healing and acceptance and use your energy on other goals and things that you enjoy.
- Get A Fertility Coach
Another option for support is to seek out a fertility coach. A fertility coach’s job is to assist you from the beginning to the end of your fertility journey. They can help you reconnect with your partner and yourself, set genuine expectations, provide helpful resources as well as provide clarification for your goals. They are great at providing inspiration and education to travel the road to parenthood.
- Know and Understand Your Options
You should make an appointment for a complete fertility evaluation with a reproductive endocrinologist. It will keep you from feeling helpless if you know what you should be doing in each step of the process. Both you and your partner will feel optimistic and hopeful if you have a game plan plus you can maintain more control over your situation. This will also reduce the amount of stress for both individuals as well as keep you from having as much anxiety about conceiving.
- Take Care of Yourself
It is imperative that you learn how to relax and enjoy life during these problematic times while trying to cope with infertility. Take relaxing baths, go for walks, get a massage and read books. Think about the things you enjoy and pick up a new hobby. It is also important to eat and sleep properly to relax and conceive. Give yourself the time and attention you need so you can be at your best. Remember, you are very important, and no one will look after number one but you!
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